ennui

would someone object if I left a suicide note that read

"died due to ennui and boredom"

or should I make it sound that I killed myself, not over a matter of not being able to keep busy, but because I underwent some great emotional and personal trauma? Should I invent the burden of an invalid sibling, an addiction riddled parent, a blind in law to be taken care of, and the event of a dead spouse too?

Would that validate suicide .. compared to my contention of ennui?
~~~~~~

There was once a girl whom everyone wanted to be with. she was funny. she was smart. she was not beautiful, but she had the wit that everyone longed to possess, she was groomed, she gleaned with polished funny-ness.

she went home everyday, and removed the cloak of being funny. underneath, there was a very bored cynical old crone that hid.

Who would you rather be with?

Dont bother answering.

Dear Diary

Excerpts from notes and To-Dos of a worldly wise Jackie.

- get a life

- exercise

- find someone who loves you.

loves you the way all the sappy emotional movie stars love their heroines to the ends of the world and to the ends of their lives.

Find a man who can be your sameer, kundan, vanraj all rolled into one.

*sigh*

- stop dreaming.

- get a life.